Complaining and Thanking

It is so easy to fall into the habit of complaining. There is a lot to complain about in life, politics, religion, money, the behavior of others, and I'm sure there are things you could add to that short list. When I complain about something, I usually try to do it in my head and then get over it. I don't really see it as wrong because it makes me feel better, doesn't involve or hurt anyone else and gives me ideas on how I want to or not want to do that thing or think or be like the thing complained about (...if that made sense).

Now the reverse side of complaining is trying to appreciate what we have and giving thanks (in my case, I think God). I have much to be thankful for.

(I hope this does not turn into my acceptance speech. You know, the one that almost every actor/actress  says 'wow I was totally unprepared' then pulls out a list of who to thank).

1) I am thankful for my job. I enjoy going into my store and everyone knows me, and greets me. It reminds me of the show Cheers. I enjoy working nights, I enjoy my regular customers, I enjoy coffee, I enjoy the company of the people I work with, I am thankful for flexibility so I can go to school and participate in my other functions.

2) I am thankful that I am doing well in school. I have worked so hard this semester for the grades I am earning. It has been so hard with no computer until now, and unreliable internet use at home. I have spent numerous hours in the computer lab at school studying, working on labs and homework.
I am excited for next semester, and the challenges it presents. I have not been a full time student in several years. I am thankful that I was granted financial aid to assist my needs.

3) I am thankful for the opportunities that Trinity United Presbyterian Church have offered to me. I love helping out and sometimes teaching the junior higher kids in Elevate. I have seen some huge leaps in maturity and faith in the two years I have been volunteering.
For over a year and a half, I have been praying to become more involved in the church. I wasn't sure how, but I felt like God was going to be opening a door for me in the future. This past week I was nominated for deacon at my church and I am thankful for that consideration. 

There are many other things I am thankful for, and I tried to keep this list to three for now. It is important to not only be thankful on Thanksgiving, but thankful all the time. It is so easy to complain about the mundane life, and it is difficult to appreciate the mundane life from time to time. You are safe, healthy, and alive!

Happy Valentines Day

Today is Valentines Day. Valentines Day has been nothing but a tilt on the fence for me. I see some people who absolutely love it and go all out for the so called holiday. Flowers, candy, dinner, dancing, chocolate, stuffed animals, poetry and every other romantic thing one can think of.
When I was growing up, we were supposed to bring Valentines for the class and we would have a class party where we would hand them out. I hated it because I didn't really get any. There came a point where it was a class requirement to bring a Valentine card for each person in the class. I felt like I was saved because I got exactly as many Valenties as everyone else did. The best ones were the ones that came with a sticker or a lollipop.
The year I was in fifth grade, Mom didn't buy valentines for us to hand out. Instead she kept me up late the night before (and when I was 10, late meant around 10 at night) and I had to make every one of the 30 or so valentines for my class out of construction paper, glue and whatever else I could find around the house. I don't really understand why my mother did not spend the $3 for the pre made ones anyone can find at Wal-mart these days.
When I got to high school, we didn't have Valentines Day parties. We could give out cards as we wanted to the school had candy-grams that came with a balloon. I would see some people who got one, and it seemed like a really fun thing to get. I also saw some people who got several, sometimes as many as 10. I never got one in all the years I went to high school. Most of my friends did, and I was happy for them. but I never seemed to get that 'special feeling.'
After high school, I decided that I was tired of being disappointed. So I quit caring about Valentines day.
I had two serious relationships, but neither of them lasted over Valentines Day. One year while I was inbetween relationships, I had the two men both bring me bouquets of daffodils, one of my favorites.
Since being married, I have not done anything for Valentines Day. No that is wrong. This is our second Valentines Day together and Greg and not done a single thing. Not even said Happy Valentines Day. I have gotten him a few nice things each year, because I love him. but he has not gotten me flowers or taken me to dinner or gotten me a Valentines Day Card. I wouldn't really mind except that we are married and I am a woman and I like doing special little things now and again, but I suppose he doesn't and I should go back to not caring.

Halloween

Halloween is coming up in 10 days. I have mixed feelings about this holiday. I have vague memories of going trick-or-treating in Hayward around my Aunty Kay's neighborhood. I think I was dressed up as a clown and I did not like the feeling of the make-up on my face. I also remember carving pumpkins at my grandparents house in Fremont.
When I was in elementary school, they used to do a costume parade at school. My mom decided she did not want me participating in that Halloween activity. I was always so angry because all of my friends would be there and would spend days talking about what they were dressing up as. I always felt so left out. Mom would keep me home from school on Halloween for many years.
That continued until I got to high school. When I was in middle school, they were past doing costume parades, but mom kept me home from school anyways. I remember one year, I think I was 12, she bought us The Wizard of Oz on VHS. We also made caramel apples. I think we ended up eating the caramel off of the apples and leaving the apples and upsetting mom. But I always liked watching The Wizard of Oz.
I do not think Halloween was really recognized in high school. I went, and other kids sometimes came dressed up and talked about their plans for the much celebrated day. Mom never let me get dressed up or do anything fun to celebrate. It was just another day.
When I moved out for the first time, I did not do anything for Halloween for the 2 years I was out. I remember posting a blog both times (2005 and 2006) about staying home and doing homework even though I knew people who were going to parties or such. Because I had never been allowed to participate growing up my whole life except the one memory when I was like 3 or 4, I did not think my mom would like it if I grew up into someone who did do things like that. I remember around Halloween of 2006, my mom called me and told me that my siblings were getting dressed up and going trick-or-treating. That phone call really hurt me because I had always wanted to do just that...something relatively normal. Getting dressed up on Halloween and going trick-or-treating. I really could not believe what she was telling me. All the years of telling me how evil Halloween, and how it revolves around Satan and witches and ghosts do not exist and every other thing I know to be true, but wanted to ignore for one night a year.
From then up until now, I think Mom has been allowing her kids to dress up and go to the Truck-or-Treat at church. I made Nina's costume last year and she wants me to make her another one this year.
Another time I got really sad was in the fall of 2008 when I was working at Disney the first time. Walt Disney World has a 2 month tine period when they have nightly parties called Mickey's Not-So-Scary Halloween Party. I remember seeing whole families all dressed up for a night of safe fun in the Magic Kingdom, and I wondered why I did not go to that. I've seen a lot of pictures of my friends going and I still wonder why I did not take the opportunity to go to it. I really want to so bad.
I still have never dressed up for Halloween, and I have always wanted to. Greg does not really want me to, so that is another dream of mine I need to do someday.

Easter, Sea World

Yeah, so today is Easter and my family went back to our old church in Fremont this morning.  It's really sad because my dad had to work today and we went and visited his side of the family. I really miss him sometimes.
So, yeah, we also leave for San Diego this Wed. Well, Mickalyn and I are leaving on Tuesday and going to LA so HAHA to all of you who have to get up at like 5 in the morning on Wed.. Oh, and if you are going, bring an extra $30 cause if you do, we are going to Sea World and if we don't, I'll cry and get all depressed and probably die. If you don't know my passion in life already, dude, you don't know me at all, get a clue people.

April Fools Harry Potter

OMG!!! The new Harry Potter trailer is out online and it is so good, I can't wait till it comes out!!! This Sat. is the CVGPC championships so everyone has got to come. It's going to rock!!
OK, I have sinned. Its April Fools day and I haven't played a single trick on anyone *GASP* I know, I usually get everyone. Turning clocks, switching the salt and sugar... for the band people who were in class today; the silent treatment...K, sorry, I just got totally rocked out by the new trailer, man, its going to be good!!!