Sunday, May 16, 2004

Time Is Ticking Away

Today in church, the topic was time and how much of it we waste. Right now, it is 11:51. I'm in a bit of a state of shock, it really hit home with some of the things I'm dealing with.  A song was played, about this dad who never had time to play ball with his son, or take him camping, or some of the really important things in life. The father was always 'busy.'
Everyone gets busy at one time or another. I'm still wondering why I forced my life to become so busy this year. For a few months, I had at least one practice six days a week.
I was so busy and not at home for so many hours, I was eating very little.
Then there is all of the drama the music programs went through. It forced some people to take actions I do not agree with and there was nothing I could do about it. I had control over nothing. It brought Mickalyn and I closer than ever. I think we have argued only once this entire school year. I don't know what I'm going to do when she leaves this August. It's always been us. When one needed the other, we always knew where the other was. We know each other. We think the same thing all of the time. I've never had such a friend as she. Cindy and I have been close in the past, but nothing like Mickalyn and I have. I admire Cindy very much as a person and as a friend. I really don't know what happened this year. Is it because I'm going out with her best friend? Is it because I'm hanging out with Mickalyn a lot more this year? What is it? Will someone fill me in here? As I said earlier, this is very important to me right now and I'd be willing to give up time I should be doing my homework to solve this. I'm willing to push my 'busy' stuff out of the way to solve this. Cindy and I have been through so much together. I have shared some of the best moments with her. We met in Mexico the summer before her freshman year. She had her hair down, glasses on and had braces. And that week in Mexico, there were only three of us girls. then There was percussion season last year when we went to Dayton, New Albany and beyond. Then last summer, she and I got really close in Maui. Like I'd do anything to bring some of those moments back. Plus I see her almost every day, have been to Mexico with her for three years now (I really wish she would adjust her schedule so she could go this year) and now, she and I won't even have this summer together.
The other thing that I had to deal with this year was probably the biggest thing I ever had to deal with. this was my personal statement this year. For 8 years, music had been the biggest part of my life. Then during percussion, I realized how much I loved music and everything about it, It is something I have to not give up on, but put it as a second or third priority in my life. I'm not sure if anyone will ever understand how hard this was for me, but I have to grow up and begin the path that will lead to my life.
At a very young age, I was interested in what was going on around my life. I have a vague memory of watching the news and the story being covered was the seed in which my every day life branched out to be as I know it. I do not remember what was being said, but I know exactly what was going on. It was an account of whale slaughtering for meat, oil and sport. Those images horrified my mind and made me think about the world on a new level.
                During my kindergarten and first grade years, I was home schooled, and this gave me opportunities that public school could not offer. For instance, my mother and I had the chance to go on atypical field trips, which included a day at Marine World in Vallejo, California. We experienced the thrill of Vigga and Yaka, the two (now deceased) killer whales of the park. Just being in the presence of them, I knew I had to have the career of a marine mammal specialist, or killer whale trainer. Now, twelve years later, I have been to see those breathtaking animals four times at Marine World and Sea World, San Diego. Read a myriad of books, been to incalculable web sites, watched too much Animal Planet, and have collected stuffed animals, pictures, and many other possessions relating to killer whales. Killer whales are my passion. That is probably the only way to describe my life as it is today.
                According to, many of the parks are requiring the minimum of a bachelor’s degree in a related field such as biology, psychology, or animal behavior. The site also suggests a strong knowledge of animal biology, behavior, water chemistry, nutrition, veterinary medicine, marine ecology, and related fields is extremely valuable if a person is truly interested in achieving success and progressing in this field, which I am. I recently wrote to Sea World, San Diego, and asked them that the requirements are for animal training. They wrote back with a personal letter, business card and plenty of information. Some of their requirements include some public speaking/performing, animal care, and training. I have studied some of there topics outside of school, but hope to take actual courses on these subject matters in college. Had there been any of these classes offered in my high school, I would have taken them already.
                My academic records represent me as an average or slightly less than average student heading for a music major. I know the classes I have averaged in (or less than) are just as important as the ones that come naturally to me, like music and biology and geometry. Because I have known what I wanted to do with my life for so long, I did not think some classes would help me get there, at the time. I now regret some of the decisions I made as a younger student, but as a result, now know almost exactly what I must do and where I must go and  to fulfill my life long dream.
                As a senior, a popular conversation topic among peers if, “so where are you planning to go to college” and the famous question, “what do you want o be when you grow up?” I have gotten many different reactions when I tell people what I want to do with my life. Some people think it is really an awesome way to direct my life. Then there are the people who think I am a total hypocrite because I do not support people who capture and hold animals for display. I have learned over the years that there is very little I can do about the captures that take place around the world (although my mother is convinced I will end up joining Save the Whales someday). But if these beautiful animals are kept and are not able to be released because of complications, I want to help give them a blissful and active lifestyle. Other people have challenged me with the question, “everyone waned to so that as a kid.” I just say, “sure, but instead of wanting to do it like everyone else, I am going to do it.”
It is now 12:29. My life is now 31 minutes shorter.
BTW, like the new look? I absolutely love it. and the time is now 1:07

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